Saturday, October 12, 2013

I Feel Like I Married The Devil

Me and my husband have been together for a very long time...over a decade.  Today we had a big blow up and after arguing I said to myself I feel like I married the devil. 

I don't understand how someone can repeatedly hurt you, fight with you, argue with you, put you down, tell you not to work, and put down you down in every aspect of you life.  It's very hurtful, it makes you feel low as scum, it tears down your self esteem, it has you crying uncontrollably, and it makes you feel like a failure.

I'm so fed up with his bull.

I was sitting at the dining room table and he was walking after the door later after our argument and I heard something say to me you married the devil.  For so many years I was so anger at him and struggled with low self-esteem, but I got into a church that really feed me the word and a lot things in my life began to change.

Do I actually feel like I married the devil...no, but do I believe I am in a battle with the enemy....yes.  My husband doesn't attend church that much.  And I think he likes it that way, but I attend church regularly and participate in church activities, so my life is completely different than what it was four years ago. 

Now that I am a little bit more saved, I as starting to wonder, am I really in a battle with the enemy. 

No comments:

Post a Comment